'Fuck It' 
How I Learned to  approach any woman

Women seem to be bouncing around everywhere in this world.  Actually, not seem to be, are.

And what used to piss me off about that?

Most of the time, I wasn’t doing anything about it.

Cleavage bulging out in isle 6. A hottie in the first row rockin’ shorty shorts -- you know, the kind where the pockets stick out below the hem line.

A jogging MILF sporting the thigh gap.

You know what I'm talking about: the kind where you look below the honeypot and see the light behind her.  It’s fucking everywhere. So why was I doing nothing?

The same reason we all do nothing. The pain of rejection.

She might be rude. She might laugh at us. God forbid her friends (or some random person standing nearby, who sees the rejection) might laugh at us.

That fear can be paralyzing.

Then I got a little older and I realized there’s a pain worse than rejection.

Not knowing.

Always wondering. What might have happened? Could I have gotten that one? Could I have that one bent over the fvcking kitchen table right now, driving home my manhood while watching the salt-n-pepper shakers go crashing to the floor?

That pain is worse than rejection.

And when that opportunity goes bouncing by, you almost never get a second chance. If you’re over 25, you’ve probably started to experience this.

Sometimes I can still see their faces. Their bodies:

  • 15 lbs of glistening muscle in a skirt that’s too short and heels that are too high.
  • An ass teaching a pair of lululemon yoga pants what’s up. Man...I fucking love lululemon.

Some of them even smiled at me?

And what did I do?

Nothing. Fvcking nothing. I broke eye contact. Looked at the ground like a loser. Or I just stood there frozen. Hesitating until, well, nothing happened.

But I’ve also had the opposite experience. Sometimes, for whatever reason, I did have the courage. I did take the chance. And I have personally experienced this enough times to know it’s true: A girl often doesn’t seem to even notice you. Then you approach her, and her face lights up. A week later her headboard is chipping paint off the bedroom wall, while her o-face confirms this reality: you manned the fuck up and made the approach. Props.

So how do you change from having the courage sometimes, to having it on command? That’s what I asked myself, and this is what I learned:

You can condition yourself to not care about rejection. Not just saying you don’t care, but actually not caring.

How? You use the simplest psychology trick in the book. Pavlov's dog.

You create a trigger. In this case a “trigger phrase.” And then you condition yourself to respond to it.

The response is that your demeanor and thought process changes, instantly, through conditioning. Call it demeanor, inner game, mindset, whatever you want. At the end of the day, it’s all the same thing.

I use “Fuck It.”

That’s my trigger phrase. If you don’t like “fuck it,” pick something else. That actual phrase don’t matter. What matters is the association you condition yourself to have with the phrase.

Here’s the steps I took to condition myself. Test it out for yourself.

  1. Pick your phrase. For this example, I will use “fuck it.”
  2. Stand in front of your bathroom mirror. You going to condition yourself to unconsciously accept 2 things: (a) that there is more pain associated with not knowing, than with being rejected, and (b) that what people think about you doesn’t matter.
  3. Close your eyes and picture a recent failure to approach. We all have them. I’m sure you can think of one from the past few days. Take a few moments. Really try to picture it as vividly as possible. Put yourself in that moment.

What did her perky little tits look like pressing through that blouse. Were the nips pointing at you? Did she have the gap between her legs? Was that booty bouncing so much it should be illegal? Did you do the fvcking stare-n-pass? You know what I’m talking about: you spot her, you nonchalantly turn your head and stare at a case full of orange juice, and wait until she walks past it.

Whatever it was, try to vividly recreate the moment. Then feel the emotion of not doing anything? How does that feel? How does it feel right now as you’re reading this? It fvcking sucks. Because you’ll never know. That opportunity came and went, and has left an unknown in your past which can never be fixed.

Then open your eyes, look at yourself in the mirror and genuinely say, “fuck it.” Say it a few times. Say it boldly and loudly and with sincerity. Say it like you fvcking mean it. Then close your eyes again. This time, instead of staring at the OJ, picture yourself walking up to her, introducing yourself, holding out your hand, her taking it, her smiling, and then you handing her your phone, and her putting her number in it.

Everything that happens in the middle (between her smiling and her putting the number in your phone) doesn’t matter for this conditioning. So don’t worry about it. The middle part will be different every time. And a successful first approach is 90% confidence, attitude, body language and tone. The remaining 10% is what you actually say (thank God). Get your mind right, get in from behind right.

Vividly feel the success. The feeling of her smiling at you. Of her being interested in you. Of getting the number. Then open your eyes and say “fuck it” a few more times, really feeling and associating those positive emotions as you say the trigger phrase.

  1. Now close your eyes and picture the exact same scenario. Except this time, the hottie rejects you. And she does it rudely. She doesn’t smile. She’s cold shouldered. She’s like “excuse me, but you need to go away,” and then she walks away. She gives you the fucking stop-sign-hand. Whatever. Make it hurt. Make it uncomfortable.

Now here’s the important part. After she walks away, picture a middle aged soccer mom standing nearby. She’s looking at you. She’s smirking. She knows you just got rejected. She just witnessed it. She thinks its funny. She thinks you’re pathetic. Now picture exactly this:

You smile right back at her. You’re smile is even bigger than hers. You wink at her. You blow her a kiss. And then you walk away, shoulders back, head held high.

As soon as she’s out of sight, open your eyes and say “fuck it,” five times. Really feel the emotion of not giving a shit what the old bag thinks.

  1. Practice the above (a) once in the morning, and (b) once at night, for 5 days in a row. Don’t miss any practice.
  2. On day 6, practice the above steps in the morning. Then go somewhere public. As soon as you get there, pick out any attractive girl, the first one you see. Look at her. Say “fuck it” to yourself and walk right up to her. *VERY IMPORTANT: Don’t hesitate, don’t think, don’t hem and haw. Just do it. Whatever happens doesn’t matter.*

When the interaction is over, close your eyes, and reinforce the trigger phrase by saying it a few times with a huge smile on your face. You will feel amazing after the interaction just for doing it so boldly and with no hesitation.

  1. Repeat the last step once a day until it becomes second nature. Do it no matter where you are (school, mall, grocery store, anywhere). If fact, just do it indefinitely and before you know it, you’ll be hitting on chicks all the time without even realizing you’re doing it.

So what do you do now? You can leave this article and say it was great, but do nothing. You can say it sucks. You can continue to hem and haw and complain about not getting the things you want in life. Or you can just fucking try it. It costs nothing to try.

And who knows, you might just get laid.

This guide is for entertainment purposes only.  No results from following this guidance can be guaranteed.  Your results may vary.

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